Dr, Ken Rigby, an authority on bullying and peer victimization, believes one of the ways in which school bullying can be reduced is by inducing children who observe bullying taking place at school to discourage it by the way they act. He believes it is a promising strategy for several of the following reasons:
1. Most bullying takes place when bystanders are present
2. When a bystander acts to discourage bullying there is a good chance (50%) the bullying will stop
3. Teachers and parents typically are not present nor are told about the bullying, so do not have the opportunity to take action.
4. A large proportion of children would like to see bullying stopped
Dr. Rigby believes that a good starting point for promoting positive bystander action by children lies in teachers and parents seeking to understand bystander situations from the children’s point of view and facilitating informed discussions about what they think should be done and how.
In these discussions teachers and parents can empower children in situations where they witness bullying or are being bullied. When the children have talked about bullying and being bullied, have some knowledge of bullies and their behaviors, and have possible responses for these situations, they are more confident and make better decisions.
Ways we can empower children to action when they are bystanders are:
• Help them see that their silence makes aggressive students more powerful and contributes to the harm done to the target
• Model positive behavior for them through our own actions
• Protect them from retaliation
• Discourage them from confronting aggressive youth directly about their behavior in most situations, but instead, help them find a wide range of safer and more effective interventions to use
• Encourage them to tell adults about the cruel behavior they see
• Help them find ways to reach out in friendship to targets of bullying and isolated peers
Ways we can empower children who are targets for bullies are:
• Mentor them and connect with them
• Increase supervision to protect them from future verbal and physical aggression and make sure adults welcome and act on their reports of future bad treatment
• Help them develop an answer to the question: “Why did he/she do that to me?” It should not be one that encourages them to blame themselves. One such answer is “ Some people like to being mean to others.”
• Involve them in expressive education/therapy where they can act, write, draw, and talk about their experiences
• Help they get support from others with similar histories
• Help them connect with a network of peer support and friendship
These things can be done in classroom meetings, school assemblies, and conversations with individuals. Parent can play a major role as they listen to and discuss these things with their children'
http://www.stopbullyingnow.com/bystanders.htm
October is Anti-Bullying Month. While the information I am sharing is focused on schools and school aged children, it applies to a far broader spectrum. It is a topic that constantly needs to be addressed and evaluated.
If we would enter “bullying in schools” into google search, we might be surprised to find the amazing number of sites that would be there. When Dr. Ken Rigby, an authority on bullying and peer victimization, entered “bullying in schools” into his google search engine in November 2006, he learned there were approximately 2,760,000 sites on the topic. So much information can be overwhelming. However, as he has researched, he has found seven points of consensus in this information. They are:
• Bullying has been reported as occurring in every school k-12 which has been investigated
• Bullying can be direct or indirect and also physical, verbal, and gestural.
• There is no consistent evidence that bullying overall is increasing, however cyber bullying is an area of growing concern, especially among older students.
• Boys are bullied physically more often than girls. Girls are generally involved with indirect bullying.
• Bullying with younger children is generally more physical, while older children use more indirect and subtle forms of bullying which tend to occur more often.
• Children typically report being bullied less often as they get older, even though being victimized tends to increase when children enter secondary school.
• Being bullied at school typically has a negative effect on the physical and psychological well-being of children who are frequently and severely targeted.
Children don't always tell parents and/or adults in their lives that they are being bullied. How can we know if this is happening in their lives? Some symptoms that a child might be a victim of bullying are:
You have decided some things you would like your children to do this summer and the atmosphere you would like in your home. How can you structure the days and weeks to successfully reach those objectives?
One good way is to create a comfortable, but firm, structure for each day. Determine a time frame and responsibilities for each person. It is best to have a routine. Your day can be as detailed and structured as you want it to be. An more loosely structured example might be:
· Awake and out of bed by 8 am
· Eat breakfast, put dishes in the dishwasher
· Get dressed.
· Check list of chores on frig.
· Complete chores by 10 am.
· Free time
· Lunch at noon. Check schedule for responsibility
· Quiet time til 1:30 This could be time for reading, academic skills, nap, etc.
· Dinner 6 pm
· Bath and bed 9:30 pm
It is vital that your goals and expectations are clear. KIS is also good advice here. Think your plan through, write it down (Remember it is only a wish, if it isn’t written down. We know what happens with wishes.), and compare it with your goals. Some questions to ask yourself are: Will this plan bring the goals to reality? Does it support what I want? Am I being reasonable? Is it too much? Do I need more details or expectations?
Tip: Brain Gym PACE would be a great item to put into your schedule. It can help get the day off to a more smooth and focused start, will be great during a quiet time or when working on academic skills, and will help when tension creeps into the day.
When summer break comes, children are not on their regular schedule. As a result, the whole family can be affected. If they go to a daycare or babysitter while you work each day, things may be much the same. However, if not, life can be very different.
Children need structure and are happier when they have it. Sometimes we think and may say, they have been in school and need a break. That is true. They have and do. However, they thrive when they have some kind of schedule. To create yours, determine what you would like your life to be like with them at home. Some question to consider might be: Do I want them to be up by a certain time? Do I want them to do daily and weekly chores? When would I like they completed? What guidelines do I want to have concerning meals? Some items to address might be time, preparation, clean-up, etc. Do I want them to read and do other activities to maintain their academic skills while away from the classroom?
As you take some time to seriously consider these types of things, make a plan to incorporate them, and follow your plan you may be surprised with the results. When structure, responsibility, and purpose are incorporated in children’s lives, their self-esteem flourishes. They are more positive, easier to motivate, happier, and more fun.
Next: “I know what I want, how do I make a plan so that I will get the results I want?"Students who participated in Reading and Math Academy at Sunset View Elementary the last school year were encouraged to raise the level of their work by increasing their energy, excitement and enthusiasm to learn. Although our students were eager at the beginning of their sessions to work hard, we found that by the middle of the session students’ focus and concentration were fading. I asked, “What can we do to maintain the mental stamina that our students need to accomplish their work for a 30-minute session of reading or math?”
Brain Gym movements came to our rescue! Earlier during the year Sara Banister instructed the Academy tutors on the purpose of Brain Gym and encouraged us to use it in the tutoring lab. We were very pleased with the results after using Brain Gym. The Cross Crawls where students touch the opposite knee with the opposite elbow and alternate, making sure they cross their upper body, seemed to be the most effective brain gym movement that improved our students focus and encouraged positive student behavior. It also increased our students’ energy and enthusiasm for learning. Applying Brain Gym in the middle of a reading session took very little time, required no set-up, and was used whenever needed. How simple is that? Brain Gym is movement with purpose and it works! Teri Yamada
Taking tests can result in feelings of concern, fear, and stress. When this happens, we are more likely to have trouble focusing, remembering, problem-solving, and doing our best. Brain Gym's Hook-ups is a tool we can use to calm down, focus, and organize our attention for the task at hand.
Hook-ups can be done standing, sitting, or lying down.
Part 1: Sit quietly. Breathe deeply.
Cross your right ankle over the left.
Cross your right wrist over the left. With palms together, thumbs down,and fingers intertwined, bring your hands up under your chin.
Hold like this for a minute or more breathing slowly.
As you inhale, touch the tip of your tongue on roof of your mouth just behind the teeth. Relax the tongue as you exhale.
If it feels safe, close your eyes and continue to breathe slowly and deeply.
Part 2: Uncross ankles and arms. Put fingertips together. Continue to breath slowly.
Hook-ups are a great tool when we want to be on task and using our whole brain for optimal performance. I have seem some dramatic results for students using them.
Coming up next: Brain Gym Activity for reading and writing.
One of the simplest things we can do to ensure we do our best is drink enough water to be adequately hydrated. Even though it is simple, it is often challenging to drink the water we need or even to remember to drink when we are busy.
When we have adequate hydration, all of our academic skills are improved. Water intake is extremely important when stress is anticipated such as before test taking. Water improves concentration, alleviates fatigue, improves mental and physical coordination, and enhances communication and social skills.
Why is water such a big deal?
About two-thirds of our body is made up of water which is an excellent conductor of electric energy. It facilitates electrical currents in our body that are conducted between our brain and sensory organs. All of the electrical and chemical actions of our brain and central nervous system depend on this.
Several things deplete our body of water leaving our cells dehydrated. One of these is stress-both psychological and environmental. Another is working with electrical equipment, such as computers, TV, etc. We may think that we are getting water through food or other drinks, while in reality, we are eating processed foods that don’t contain water and, like caffeinated drinks, may be dehydrating our bodies. When we are consuming these items, we may need to drink more water rather than depend on them for the fluid that our body needs.
As you prepare to do your best, be sure that your water intake is adequate. The most efficient way to have the water we drink absorbed is when it is taken frequently and in small amounts at room temperature.
Tomorrow: Hook-ups invite calm while focusing and organizing scattered attention.
Whether it is a break with an entire classroom or a just a few children. "Simon says" is always a fun and great way to move. You can lead or they can. Simon says point to the south. Simon says point to five pieces of information on the walls. Simon says point to the new poster put up this morning. Use other movements than pointing, such as bending, turning, or twisting. How about jumping, lifting one leg or putting your left hand on your right shoulder while lifting your right leg. Make it simple. Make it more complicated. Just remember that movement is the key to learning.
